Over the past 2 years, I've grown and changed so much. So much so that I noticed that I get annoyed so easily at every single little things lately. And my temper has changed in a bad way. No idea what is happening to me but I think my uncle was right. Many years ago when I was a little kid back in primary school, my uncle who loves to share his fortune-telling-sense-thingy (whatever fuck u call that) on people's lives said that I am a selfish person and would not be able to be with anyone cause of my attitude. It's true in a way I guess cause I noticed that too, lazy to explain about it but perhaps, I should live on my own and grow old on my own and die on my own. Less trouble to everyone out there. No one would be affected. Everyones happy. World peace.
Everyone has their own way of living their lives and I am in no position to tell anyone how to live theirs. But here's mine and at how I look at life or rather how I think it should be:
- Live and be contented with what you have because life is fucking short and if you do not make good use of it then you'd die not knowing what you have done in your life.
- Always look at the bright side of everything and anything that you come across. You can always look at things from 2 angles, good side or bad side. Be it diagnosed with a disease, being scolded by boss, failed in exam, etc. it does not hurt to look at it in a positive way. Everything happens for a reason right?
- I believe that you always have options in everything you do in life. You choose your life and you decide your life. If it is hardcoded in your head that your life is a shit hole and it will forever be, then you gotta do something about that!
- Live a simple life, make it less complicated. Of course not everything is NOT complicated but if it is possible, make it simple! For example, things as basic as answering to a question asked by your friend/ colleague. Sometimes not everything you gotta give a 3-side answers (positive, negative and neutral) if it's that straightforward or if it's just a normal chat. Try making things less complicated and you will see how it affects the way you look at things in life.
- Finally, love yourself and your life and at the same time, make good use of it. This is the least you could do I'd say. There's no point to cry in despair everyday saying how fucked up your life is, how lonely you get, how sucky your job is, etc. and yet you do nothing about it. Go fuking get a life then!
Of course, that being said, it is always easier said than done and honestly, I know I can't do all that but at least I tried and still trying to improve it. Afterall, it is your life. And life is like driving your car. You're the driver and you steer the wheel to direct where you wanna go. You can choose to go the smooth highway road or you can choose to go through the bumpy trunk road. At the end of the day, the destination is where you wanna be.
So, the final question to ask myself... Should I go back to being this?
