Lucky or sucky?

Think...all you can!

Something is bugging me but I don't know what. Why is it always like this?

Things aren't going really well for me and it feels sucky everyday having to go through shit like this. I'm a person who hate changes. I never liked changes. I fear of them! I feel comfortable living in a way I feel it's just nice in everything. But, after some time, I tend to build up the courage and face it. Accept those changes and be prepared to face them, no matter what. Hence, the many choices I made for the past months. But for some reason, I think I kinda screwed up some of them and I felt like a fool. I refuse to let any shit happen to my life again even though I know things like this cannot be controlled, but at least I tried and am still trying, but things just don't go the way I expected it to be anymore. If only humans can move on with their lives easily, this world will be a better place. Humans have feelings. I know people go through hell sometimes, but this is part of life that we got to face it. Whatelse should I do to please everyone and think for the sake of everybody? Am I being selfish all this while? Or have I not make it clear enough? I'm a very easy-going person, I don't really think or look at things in a very specific manner, or I don't have much worries for anything until I really have to. Maybe that's why I tend to ignore alot of things and focus only on things that are important to me. Therefore, I don't usually think so far ahead of me but instead, just think of what's going to happen tomorrow, the day after tomorrow, next week, or next month. That's it! This is definitely one thing I know I must change. Question to ask myself; am I doing the wrong or right thing? Why is it so then? One thing for sure, certain things that I say, I really mean it. Certain people will find it hard to believe but some will think it's nothing but the truth. Well, I just got to prove it then. I hate to say this but I think I'm really lost and have no idea what I'm doing here sitting, typing shit on my blog, and doing nothing but to think of shit. Last night, I had this one dream. Weird but sweet! I dreamt of Nawi omg! It's Nawi, not Mawi duh. Nawi, my NS crush LOL! So yeah, that's what I've been doing the whole evening today, besides learning to make sushi, nothing but shitting shit out of my brain.

ps: If you have noticed it, what I wrote above is kinda random. Oh well, random thoughts happen sometimes =)